05/28/23 - 30 years later, total Chinese population will fall to just 570 million.
Shenzhou 16 is launching tomorrow 9:31AM, with the astronauts Jing Haipeng, Zhu Yangzu, and Gui Haichao. In the comments, people are both celebrating how Jing Haipeng is going into space for the fourth time, and how now people with glasses can go to space.
Yaya the Panda has returned to Beijing Zoo. Her health is in stable condition, and Beijing Zoo have provided her with her own enclosure, a specialised team of nutritionists, healthcare specialists, and caretakers. Because Yaya is entering old age, she’ll have to rest in peace and quiet for a while to get used to her new environment, so she won’t be on display yet. But the Zoo will be posting information on their official social media as to the status of Yaya.
Comments say, “Her condition looks so much better!”
“Yeah, she looks like a completely different panda compared to a month ago. Some people are really gonna have to eat their words. Yaya, eat as much as you can! Your life will be great from here on out. Thank you, everyone who protected Yaya.”
“Everyone, pay attention to Meixiang, Tiantian, and Little Miracle at the Washington Zoo. Make sure they don’t become the next Lele. They need our attention. Social media views could save their life!”
“After my MIL got out of the hospital, my SIL won’t split the cost with us? It’s been a week now, and I told my husband to talk to her about splitting the fees, because we’ve got three kids in the house, and he’s our only source of income. He says that he doesn’t want to bring it up, so I talked to her myself, and she replied to me like this!!”
OP attaches screenshots of their texts, which reads: OP: “Your brother’s too shy to bring it up, but your parents gave birth to both of you. We should split the cost of her stay in the hospital. You should give the money to us.”
SIL: “Sis, I don’t feel like I’ve got an obligation to pay the money at all. My parents never let me go to school, but they supported my brother through school. They bought him a house and a car. I’ve got nothing. They even took away my bride price of 60K. What more do you want from me?”
OP: “They still gave birth to you though.”
SIL: “I can help take care of her if she’s not doing well, but I don't have any money. :)”
Comments say, “If the parents give everything they have to the son, it’s pretty normal for the daughter to not share the fees. If the parents were really equal to their kids, and split their inheritance equally too, then she’d have to pay this money, right? [Doge]”
“I mean, guess why your husband doesn't want to bring it up.”
“Dude, she’s being more than fair by being willing to help take care of her. You know what a nurse costs these days? Why the hell are you still demanding money?”
“Don’t take away a kid’s chance to be raised by his father. Kids are humans, not a toy. You can’t have mommy play with him for a couple of days, and daddy play with him for a couple of days. A lot of mother feel that newborns are still breastfeeding, they’re too frail, and men don’t have breastmilk, and it’s more convenient to just feed the baby themselves, so they take on all of the childcare. And wait until the baby is older before having daddy handle him. And then, when the baby does get older, he only wants mommy, and cries whenever he’s handed off to anyone else. You get worried about his crying, and now you’re forced to do everything yourself.
Every time the baby comes into contact with daddy, it forms a negative feedback loop. Daddy will also get upset and hurt and start to lose confidence in his ability to take care of babies, and be more and more reluctant to handle childcare by himself.
And that’s how you end up with a husband who might as well be dead.”
Comments say, “Isn’t it said that moms have a natural love for babies because of their hormones and how the baby was actually inside of them and was born through them? They start off with an emotional foundation, whereas daddies have to build that bond afterwards?”
“What does it mean that the newborn population is less than 8 million now? A lot of people have a hard time grasping numbers like that. They feel like 8 million is quite a lot.
I used a set of statistics to really try to convey what 8 million means. In China, there are 3032 hospitals with an ob/gyn department, of which 26 are state level, 377 are city level, and 2554 are county level.
If new births are less than 8 million, well, let’s say it’s 8 million even. 8 million ÷ 365 days ÷ 3032 = 7. That is to say, every single one of these hospitals only has 7 newborns per day on average.
A hospital with full equipment, a full staff of nurses and doctors, wings upon wings of rooms, only has 7 patients a day. Just thinking about it is scarily empty.
This means that all the industries that revolve around babies will begin to die off, starting with private ob/gyn hospitals. They’ve been shutting their doors with record speed in the last few years. Next, 90% of baby product manufacturers are going to die, from early tutoring lessons to daycares to even primary schools, middle schools, and universities. In the next 5 years, we’re going to face an avalanche.
Scientists have already pointed out that in a country with over a billion population, having less than 8 million children born per year isn’t something mere “population collapse” can describe.
After we’re done with birth numbers, let’s talk about death records. Based on the 50’s and 60’s people, China’s average lifespan is 78.2 years. That means that the number of people dying in China over the next two years is going to break 16 million. After five years, that number is going to break 20 million. If there’s not any changes, then 30 years later, total Chinese population will fall to just 570 million.
Something else that’s depressing. The number of weddings on Valentine’s Day this year is like this:
Jiangsu, 11156, 25.6% less than last year.
Guangdong, 12450, 40% less than last year, almost halved.
Sichuan, 16000, 36% less than last year.
Fujian, 6270, 38% less than last year.
Guizhou, 6873, 53% less than last year, straight up halved.
Hubei, 9455, 46.6% less than last year, almost halved.
Hunan, 4576, 74% less than last year, almost extinct.”
Comments say, “Experts should be suggesting handing out a house for free to every hosuehold. They keep going on about useless bullshit.”
“God, isn’t this amazing? Why do we need all these people around to involute?”
“I spit upon the 8 million who got married.”
A tiktok video of a doggy who will eat whatever his owner eats. He tries to eat veggies that his dog normally turns up its nose at, and the doggy snarfs all of them down.
Comments ask, “Have you considered he might just really like eating your spit?”
“Food in someone else’s bowl is the most delicious.”
“He’s a pretty polite doggy—he only eats what you spit out!”
A childcare blogger writes, “How do you know if your kid is actually smart? Why do so many smart kids become mediocre when they grow up? It’s because most people have the wrong definition of “smart”. True smartness is focused, thoughtful, disciplined, and goal-oriented. And from what I’ve observed of successful young people, they’re all people who are willing to start from the bottom and work the hardest and least rewarding jobs. The kind who can push themselves and keep at their task. We should all raise our kids to be like this.”
Comments say, “Yeah, this is exactly right. My cousin was like this as a kid, and a lot of the older people in our family disliked her for not being smart enough. She’s now completing her doctorate degree in Fudan University (top 3 university).”
“Well, fuck, I’m not a successful person either.”
“What if your kid is super focused and completes all his tasked, but don’t have any self-control and has a fiery as hell temper? What kind of kid is that?”
A boy leaped off of a 26th story building with an umbrella—he is in stable condition in the hospital. According to insiders, he was attempting to mimic a scene from a cartoon, where an umbrella was used as a parachute. Some internet comments think can we please stop blaming the cartoons? And some internet comments think this is a problem of the parents not teaching them well. This news company puts out a poll, asking people who they think should be responsible, the parents, the cartoon company, both, or cartoons should be restricted by age group?
Comments ask, “If the cartoons are responsible, then how come I’ve never tried to imitate cartoons when I was a kid?”
“Parents are responsible—they’re the legal guardians. They didn’t perform their responsibility.”
“We’ve watched cartoons for decades—why did kids never used to do this shit in the past?”
Someone posts screenshots of texts with her boyfriend, saying, “I can’t believe anyone would say this shit to their SO. It came out of nowhere. There was a sudden downpour. He had a car. I didn’t actually ask him to come pick me up or anything, but even against your worst enemy, is there a need to text them and be so vindictive as this?”
Boyfriend, “Wow, it’s raining hard, huh? Hahahahaha.”
OP: “:P Pft”
BF: “Drown out there, bitch.”
OP: “K. So you never even thought about how I’d make it back home.”
BF: “You rode a bicycle didn’t you? Ahahahahaha, damn, bitch. You’re a grown ass woman and you can’t get home?”
OP: “Seriously, fuck off.”
BF: “Fuck, do you seriously need me to teach you? Only fucking retards don’t know to run home when it’s raining. Dumb cunt. Garbage. Just get rained on then. Drown and die.”
OP: “I’ve never known anyone like you. I didn’t even tell you to come get me. I didn’t say anything to you. Why do you need to mock me like this?”
BF: “Did I mock you? Did I say I mocked you? You getting rained on? Hahahahaha.”
BF: “So, did you make it home?”
OP: “Yes.”
BF: “How? How did you get home so fast? No way. There’s no way you made it this fast. I bet you didn’t ride your bicycle. Did you get a taxi?”
OP: “?”
BF: “There’s no way you rode your bicycle. Tell me how you got home?”
OP: “I got a taxi.”
BF: “Oh woooooow! You got a taxi! Great fucking job! So you didn’t get rained on. Sigh…………..”
OP: “First of all, I didn’t do shit against you. Secondly…”
BF: “Lol, you’re funny. What a fucking turn off.”
OP: “I didn’t tell you to come get me. Third, why would you not help me out and mock me?”
BF: “Sure. Not that I would’ve picked you up anyways. Why should I? You’re not my boss. You don’t pay me.”
OP: “What the hell is wrong with you?”
BF: “Which one of my sentences had the word “mock” in it? Point it out to me. Lol, ur so smart. Fuck off, I got shit to do.”
OP: “What did I do to you?”
Comments say, “Is this the first time he’s done this? Did he get triggered by something? If this is the first time, you should take him to a hospital. If it’s not the first time, you should take yourself to the hospital.”
“Based on the follow up, it seems like nothing set him off. He wanted her to come home in the morning, but she stayed out until the afternoon, when it started raining.”
“If a random stranger talked to me like this, I’d slap the shit out of him.”
A screenshot of someone searching on Baidu, “Why can’t you flush cockroaches down the toilet?” The answer given by the website is, “The reason you cannot flush cockroaches down the toilet is because they might crawl out. Cockroaches have great survivability and can breath with their stomach. Their stomachs will secret oily substances and protect it from water. Cockroaches can even survive in a vacuum. Thus, if you flush cockroaches down the toilet, it might crawl back out again. That’s why you can’t flush cockroaches down the toilet.”
Comments add, “Even if you stomp on a cockroach and kill it dead, if you don’t throw it outside, the next day, you’ll see tiny maggots on the dead cockroach. If you don’t clean up the tiny maggots, they’ll turn into a pile of tiny cockroach. I’ve witnessed this myself. It’s horrifying.”
A Chinese-medicine doctor writes his summary after 6 years of experience, for the best medicine for children.
Sore, inflamed throat. Best medicine is Pudilan (a mix of Chinese medicine composing of mostly dandelion, Corydalis bungeana, woad, and Chinese skullcap). It helps with swollen skin, upper respiratory infection, pneumonia, saliva gland infection, throat infection, tonsil infection.
Weak immune system. Best medicine is Yierxin (a zinc and calcium supplement). Used for weakened immune systems, repeated colds, influenza A, first time covid. Helps boost immune system and keep sicknesses at bay.
Skin allergy reaction. Best medicine: Calamine lotion. Can be used on any type of skin allergy reaction, bug bites, or skin rashes.
Fevers and headaches. Best medicine: Cinnamon tablets. Useful for fevers, headaches, body pains, congestion, runny nose, and red throat.
Colds. Best medicine: Chiqiao (a mix of Chinese medicine composing of golden-bell, fermented soy bean, mint, Japanese catnip, gardenia, rhubarb, sweet wormwood, root of the red peony, areca nut, and so on.) Useful for fevers, colds, sore throat, light coughing. It’s super bitter, but it works.
Not digesting fast enough. Best medicine: Shaya Red Fruit drink (a mix of Chinese medicine composing of glucose, hawthorn berry powder, prebiotics, chicken gizzard powder, Chinese yam powder, and so on). Useful for slow digestion caused by a weak spleen, indigestion, bloating, constipation, and disturbed sleep.
Endless coughing. Best medicine: Bairui powder (polysaccharides, glycoside, isoflavones, organic bases, steroids, organic acids, and various minerals). Great for colds, fevers, pneumonia, tracheitis, nose infection, etc.
Suddenly waking up at night covered in sweat. Best medicine: Longmu Bone-Strengthening Pills. When children lack vitamin D, they’ll sweat at night and wake up in terror, lose their appetite, and slow in skeletal development.
He attaches a video of traditional Chinese massage therapy on a baby.
Comment section says, “Jesus Christ, Chiqiao for children. Anyone who can get even a drop into their kid’s mouth has ruined that relationship forever. Even adults can’t stand this medicine, why do we have to torture our kids with it.”
“Aren’t pregnant women and children supposed to stay away from Pudilan?”
“If traditional medicine wasn’t so bitter, kids would be a lot more accepting of it.”
“Just had a discussion in the office about 1st of June that’s coming up (International Children’s Day). Schools often have all kinds of events that you have to pay to enter, or buy clothes for. Whether that’s reasonable or not, whether you have to participate. Just as I was discussing this, I happened upon a tiktok video where a parent said that their daughter’s Children’s Day event was going to cost 200 RMB, and the clothes for it isn’t something she can wear every day. They felt it wasn’t worth it, so they didn’t sign their kid up. All the other kids went rehearse at school, and their daughter rested at home. I opened the comments, and found that everyone more or less agreesd she should still have participated.
I read them in detail, and I feel everyone’s being pretty reasonable. Participating is better. From the point of view of the little kid, she surely wanted to join in. What kid doesn’t like group events? Kids need socialisation and common topics too.”
She shows a screenshot of the comments, which say, “After Children’s Day is over, when everyone is talking about it, how is she going to feel when she has nothing to add?”
“The point is participation, and the pride they get out of that.”
“It’s rare to see a family who can’t even put up 200RMB.”
“Ignoring everything else, you didn’t even let her go on spring excursion? What kid doesn’t look forward to going on spring excursion with all her friends?”
“The point of school is to participate in group events. Or else she could’ve just stayed at home and taken online lessons.”
“You’re gonna cause a whole lot of insecurity by not paying this little bit of money for your kid. You can cut down on snacks or clothes. I would never go cheap on these group events.”
“How would you feel if you wanted some flowers, but your husband feels they’re useless because they’ll die after a few days anyways? The emotional value something brings can’t be measured by whether it’s practically useful or not.”
A blogger posts screenshots of texts between a guy and a girl, where the guy says, “I honestly think I’m pretty awesome. You should like me. I’ll say a couple of points, and see how you feel then?
I like nature, I like rivers and lakes and oceans and hiking.
I like travelling and eating great food. I’m a hardcore foodie.
I’d like my girlfriend to be someone who’s kind and down to earth.
I like my girlfriend to be tall and big, a proper lady in the day, and a beast at night.”
Girl: “What’s the point of this when I don’t like you?”
The blogger writes, “I’ll translate for you. 1. I’ll take you to see free sights. 2. We’ll eat at night markets. 3. I hope you learn to appreciate me and never spend my money. 4. I’m happy about your height. I’d like to fuck you tonight.”
Comments say, “Girl, this isn’t enough for you?” (well known cheesy romance novel line that’s become a meme)
“A beast at night? Don’t make me laugh to death. It is waaaaay too confident in itself.”
“Look, I’m not sexist, but men shouldn’t be on the internet. This is a rule left behind by our ancestors. Internet is pronounced yin-ternet for a reason, not yang-ternet. Men can’t get on the internet, or they’ll lose their yang energy. I’m just saying this for men’s own good. This is our traditional culture. This isn’t something new. Every time we get on the internet, we say gtfo men, gtfo men, but men still continue to show up. It’s super disrespectful. Don’t you know to fit in to local cultures?”
A paediatrician writes, “Saw a fat kid yesterday, 9-years-old, hasn’t hit puberty yet, and his bone age is 2.5 years ahead. I started from breakfast and asked what he ate every day. The mother said, “Well, in the morning, I’ll usually make two dishes, one meat, and one vegetarian, paired with rice or other carbs…” Just hearing about breakfast has made me gain endless respect for this woman. She’ll get up in the morning and make two whole new dishes. I am ashamed of myself. Compare the bento I made my child. My kid told me, “Mom, I took a photo of my lunch, and my phone automatically categorised it as a plant, not food.”
Comments say, “I do it super simple at my house—milk, boiled egg, steamed bao, dumplings, vitamin D supplement, calcium supplement. This is why my kid’s shorter than average.”
“What if they just drink a glass of milk in the morning and reject everything else?”
“Our kiddo’s in kindergarten, and eats an egg, and a glass of milk, and maybe occasionally some cereals. But he’s taller than all his peers and fatter too. I’ve already switched him to fat-free milk.”
A different news agency is reporting on the return of Yaya to Beijing. I’ll note that it uses the exact same copy-pasted wording as the first news agency.
“We’ve got four people in our family, and my mom cooked three eggs. Everyone said that they didn’t want it. My dad and I just came back from out of state. I asked my mom what she was thinking, and she tried to get my dad to give her a way out, saying that my dad had already eaten somewhere else. But my dad didn’t concur with her or anything.
In the end, my mom ate all the eggs herself.
Maybe I just shouldn’t have brought it up, and maintained the bizarre balance like everyone else.”
Comments say, “What a coincidence. My mom is exactly like this. She always makes a little bit less food than necessary, to see who says they don’t need any. One day, she reheated one less bun than we had, saying that she doesn’t want any. But if I try to eat the buns, she just sits opposite me and stares at me. I got my plate and some vinegar and ate all of it in front of her, and she got up and reheated another from the fridge.”
“I know this OP, I’ll explain the context. His mom plays favourites a lot. OP has a younger sister. So the mom reacted this way probably because she genuinely wasn’t making food for OP.”
“My mom’s exactly the opposite. She always buys one more than necessary. Like, for a household of 3 people, she’ll buy 4 crabs. The extra one is always for her.”
The costume some school has chosen for their Children’s Day event has caused controversy on the internet:
Comments ask, “Who chose these clothes? Why would the parents agree?”
“God, I’m so scared of pervs in the audience.”
“Even boxers would’ve looked a lot better. Such a great performance, ruined by clothes.”
“If they’re only making girls do something while letting boys off, then the intent is pretty clear.”
“If an adult wore these clothes, they’d be banned for lewd content. Why would it be okay on kids? What the hell are people thinking?”