A compilation of people talking about giving your family money once you start working, a particularly strong custom in Guangdong:
“Can someone from out of state tell me, do you really not have to pay your parents? Do they actually, in fact, give you their money??” [Guangdong IP]
“In Guangdong, if you’re already married, do you still have to give your parents money?”
“I gotta pay them 2000 RMB a month.”
“I’m shocked. Is Guangdong the only place that does this in China?”
“I just want to know if you guys are giving your parents money because they’re poor, of if it’s just because it’s customary.”
“No wonder Guangdong people love having kids. They never leave home and they give you their pay check.”
“Yeah, I’ve never seen anyone get money back from their kids. Round where I live, if I graduate and find some kind of a job and not rely on my parents for everything, even if I occasionally hit my parents up for money, I’m still a wonderfully filially pious kid that everyone praises.” [Henan IP]
“Out of staters really don’t have to pay their parents money? T_T Tell me it’s not real T_T I’ve been working since I was 14, just keeping 200 RMB a month for myself to buy breakfast with and handing everything else over.”
“How is it possible to not give your parents money? It’s the same everywhere, it’s just a matter of amount. I’m from Guangxi.”
“I just want to know, don’t you guys feel ashamed for still spending your parents’ money once you’re grown up and working? Why would people feel they’re entitled to their parents’ money?”
“I’ve got a friend whose husband is over 50 years old now and has never done any housework in his life.
How bad is it? She went out one day on an errand and ordered him some takeout for lunch. When it arrived, it didn’t come with any utensils, and he called her like, “How am I supposed to eat this without chopsticks?”
And she had to get a ride back home to get a pair of chopsticks out of the kitchen for him.
365 days a year, so long as he’s at home, he never lifts a finger. If there’s something on a high shelf that his wife can’t reach and she asks him for help, he’ll say, “Well, you bring a chair over so I can step on it then.”
For a while, his wife got injured and was walking around with a limp, and she still had to cook for him and serve him his food.
This man, at 50-years-old, decided to get a dog.
And from that point, without fail, whether it’s raining or snowing, he walks his dog every day. He’s completely changed his habit of sleeping in late, and takes the dog out at 6AM every day. If he’s out drinking until late at night, the second he gets home, he’ll take the dog out. He looks at that dog with more love in his eyes than he looked at his high school crush.
Yet he still doesn’t do any housework.
Like, does he not want to do housework? Does he not know how to? Look at how he’s taking care of his dog—he’s thoughtful and patient and hardworking and tolerant. He doesn’t even get gross out picking up the dog’s poops.
But he still refuses to do housework. His wife can’t make him do anything. He cares less about the wife that’s been serving him for decades than the dog he’s had for a couple of months.
This is how much women matter to some men.
And this is why men love getting married.”
Comments say, “Yeah, his dog has much higher status than his wife in my eyes.”
“Hey, they’re happy with their lives. We shouldn’t get too involved as outsiders.”
“You’re right. If there’s one man like this out there, all men must be like this. I’m sure the man who found out all three of his daughters weren’t actually biologically his was the exact same way. [Doge]. I mean, surely, this is just an outlier?”
“How do I tell my date that I have a virgin complex?
I’m 29 years old and still a virgin, passed my civil servant exam back when I was 27 and then started dating.
Before, I was too shy to ask girls about any past relationships, and even if they told me about exes, I was too shy to ask how far they’d gone with him.
There was one girl I was really into that I never asked, and on our third date, she told me she had an ex that she was with for 6 years. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but then it started bothering me more and more. I feel like my virgin complex is getting more serious.
Is this a good way to put it? “Let’s talk about our dating experience.” And then I can say, “I’m a very conservative person and I’m against premarital sex. How do you feel?”
How do I not turn girls off?”
Comments say, “Wow, a virgin at 29, and not only do you not feel insecure, you’re looking down on other people? I guess there’s a reason you’re still a virgin.”
“Without going into whether this counts as “conservative” or not, I think whether someone’s had sexual relationships is a matter of privacy. You can make it your dating standard, but you can’t ask that kind of question before you’ve gotten to a certain point in your relationship with someone. Can you ask your date’s parents whether she’s had sex before? Can you ask the matchmaker whether she’s had sex before? If you feel like that’s awkward, then you shouldn’t ask. Similarly, you can think this way about all questions.”
“How is it fair at all? Nobody wants you, so you’re involuntarily celibate. But you’re demanding hot girls that everyone likes not sleep with anyone they went on a date with and had feelings for until they meet you and marry you. This is just double standards.”
“My friend complained to me last night that she showed up to her new job yesterday in an outfit she was very happy with, but when she got home and took a picture, she saw it was actually really trashy.
She said she was preparing to go to the second round interview at a job at a publisher’s yesterday. She bothered to dress up in the morning and thought she looked quite smart. But she didn’t pass the interview. She went home straight away and took a photo of her outfit, and she said that it looked trashy.
She asked me how I felt, how she should dress herself. What do you guys think? What kind of clothes would suit her?”
Comments say, “Yang Zi [actress] showed up at Sina headquarters yesterday and she didn’t wear something as nice as this.”
“If she’s interviewing at an average publishers, her outfit is good enough. It’s not like she’s trying to get a job with a fashion magazine, right?”
“Your outfit doesn’t really have much to do with whether your job interview is successful or not, unless you’re wearing something super inappropriate. What they’re looking for in a job interview is your overall abilities, your communication skills, your professional skills, etc. Any business casual clothes will do. Don’t get too hung up on this one detail.”
“If depression was renamed to Shitty Asshole Syndrome or something, 90% of people who pretend to be depressed would vanish overnight. A cool name is a necessary condition for pretentious people to flock to an illness. Why else don’t anyone pretend that their foreskin is too long? Why don’t people fake strokes? Why don’t people fake urinary incontinence? Why don’t people spend 30 RMB on the internet to take quizzes to check if they have anal fissures? People would stop writing posts like, “Wow, I feel like I have Shitty Asshole Syndrome—people need to come coddle me immediately!””
Comments say, “Wow, you’re so mean to people with depression.”
“This isn’t funny at all.”
“Seriously, guys, have you not seen people fake mental illnesses at all? I’ve met a couple who live entirely ordinary lives. They just hang out, chill, date, have fun, whatever. They don’t show any depression symptoms like slow reaction, zoning out, lacking interest in hobbies or anything. And they’ll tell young teachers who don’t know enough that they have depression and procrastinate on all their work, or show up to class late, or whatever. And every time, they use depression as an excuse.”
“Stop keeping octopus as pets, guys!
I wanted a new pet for myself, try to heal myself by taking care of a little animal. I wanted something smart, since that way, I get more emotional feedback from it.
I wanted to get an octopus—an alien creature with two nervous systems, three hearts, and nine brains. Octopi are super smart. Everyone says it’s really hard to take care of them. But that wasn’t enough to quell my enthusiasm. I’m confident I can take care of any animal. So I started educating myself about octopi, watching videos of people taking care of octopi on the internet, thinking about how I would go about preparing an environment for my octopi at home. After a night of research, I’ve given up on ever keeping an octopus.
There was a newbie who got an octopus, bought it off the internet and had it shipped home. The octopus died in transit, not because it lacked oxygen or the water wasn’t right or whatever. The octopus got scared in its dark, sealed environment, and killed and ate itself.
When the octopus arrives, so long as it’s alive, it’s normal for it to be missing a few tentacles. If you provide it with a comfortable environment, the tentacles will grow back. You should probably buy one from a fish market close to your house. A small octopus is only 20-30 RMB, and they’re cheap and healthy.
Some people keep octopus in a small tank, and the octopus gets depressed and commits suicide.
Some people keep octopus in a giant, luxury tank with a ton of fish to keep it company. But the tank was too big, and the octopus was so scared that it hid beneath the decorations and didn’t eat for three days until it died from starvation.
Some people keep octopus in a medium-sized tank, with just a coral reef fish the same size as the octopus inside, plus a few shrimp for it to eat. The octopus was doing really well, eating every day, playing with its owner, shaking hands, taking photos. But by the time the octopus was healed up, and its broken tentacles grew back, it started banging its head against the tank. When it gets too dizzy to continue, it’ll crawl under the decorations to rest. Eventually, the octopus figured out it couldn’t get out and committed suicide.
Some octopi successfully get out and start running around the room, trying to find a way to escape. Walking around in a dry room is very damaging to their tentacles, since they’re a soft creature. Their skin gets torn up by the floor, and they’re deprived of water and oxygen. A lot of octopus die trying to get back to the ocean. Some get picked up by their owners and thrown back in their tank, and as soon as they’ve recovered, they go back to slamming their head against the tank.
Octopi can feel pain. When they bite themselves, they feel pain. When they bang their head against the tank, they feel dizzy.
They’re too smart. Smart enough to want freedom. If they want freedom, they’ll get depressed. They won’t be satisfied with being kept hostage, even in a comfortable environment. In my opinion, they’re better off getting eaten than being kept at pets, because at least it’s not psychological torture.
I’ve been really down lately. This is all I can think of. When I get better, I want to write more on octopus.”
Comments say, “We’re living in an even more depressing society, surviving in spaces even smaller than a fish tank, with more dangers in our futures than fish in a school. We have no freedom. We might not even have enough of the resources we rely on to stay alive, like oxygen. But we don’t even have the right to commit suicide.”
“Yeah, don’t keep octopus. Don’t imprison them. If you’re human at all, just don’t. I’ve seen a video before of an uploader with a pet octopus who tried jailbreaking several times and got caught every time, and ended up killing itself.”
“Octopus: I hear human mommies don’t kill themselves after giving birth to their babies. What fascinating creatures! I could never imagine such a thing!”
According to Peng Pai News, “Ma Ling’s daughter, Fang, was going to school at the Shaoshi Mountain Martial Arts College in Dengfeng City. According to Ma Ling, in August, 2023, Fang was raped by a coach at the Martial Arts College named Jiang. She only found out after a month had passed, and she contacted the police. In October, 2023, Dengfeng Police Department gave them a notice of no charges pressed, as they believe, “No crime has taken place.” The police explained to Ma Ling that her daughter had consented to sexual relations.
Ma Ling believes the police’s conclusions do not match with the facts and applied to the prosecutor’s office for them to review the case.
January, 2024, Dengfeng Procuratorial Office held a meeting on this case and issued orders for Dengfeng police to reopen ivestigations.
12th of April, Dengfeng detective department tell Peng Pai News that the police are, in fact, investigating this case but they cannot make any further comments. The Shangshi Mountain Martial Arts College says that the nature of the case is subject to further police investigation.”
Comments say, “Is 14 even above the age of consent!?”
“These coaches sure cover for each other well. They should look into all of them. There’s probably other victims.”
“Ridiculous. Consent only makes sense between peers. How can you even talk about consent between a teacher and a student?”
“Bean sprouts are the world’s most evil vegetable.
Bean sprouts are a very ordinary vegetable—a textbook example of not amazing, but not awful either. It often defrauds people by hiding beneath the Maocai [type of spicy stew] or beneath slices of duck blood in a blood soup. When people believe they’ve purchased a big, filling bowl of blood soup, the bean sprout will jump out and give them a critical strike. The shady bean sprouts will hide at the bottom of the bowl to keep at the expression on people’s faces and make fun of them in secret.
Evil bean sprouts will trick humans into eating them, hiding themselves in salty, flavourful soup. But the insecure bean sprout has no idea that humans hate it. Without Maocai, nobody would eat bean sprouts at all.”
Comments say, “I have to speak out on behalf of bean sprouts! Bean sprouts! You’re actually a great guy! Who can imagine such a beautiful sprout can grow out of such a small bean? You go together with everything, whether it’s blood soup or green onions! You’re a kind, loving person who’s just used by evil store owners everywhere to fill up their blood soups! Not only do you have to be eaten by evil humans, you’ll also get despised! No one knows how much you look forward to when people peel aside the heavy layer of meat on top of you. You hope for a kiss from people. But they always roll their eyes and throw you aside. Your heart slowly chills just like your body…”
“Don’t be mean to the bean sprouts! They clean your palate so well when you’re eating something greasy! It’s a wonderful baby that doesn’t take any peeling and doesn’t have any seeds! It grows out of a bean, but it’s super clean and doesn’t taste like beans at all! It never fights for attention no matter what dish it’s in! Why would you be mean to bean sprouts after it’s done so much for you!? Bean sprouts are good, humans are evil!”
“I feel like the best part of blood soup or Maocai is the bean sprouts, because it’s all at the bottom so it absorbs all the juices. And it’s so crunchy and tasty!”
“Yeah, bean sprouts are at least tasty. The oodles and oodles of shredded dry tofu they add in is the true evil vegetable. Although it’s not really a vegetable.”
I'm gonna use 肛裂综合征 from now on lol